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Today’s episode is different (though I’m still not sure what “normal” is for the Unsocialized Podcast). It’s also long, probably the longest episode I’ve recorded so far.
We’re talking about what I call poverty thinking. I was inspired to address this because of an article I read in which a woman shares her experience and feelings about being poor.
So, tell me what you think. Am I out to lunch? Misinformed?
How do you deal with ‘poverty thinking’? How do you talk to your kids about poverty?
April says
I am a first-time listener. I chose this particular episode, because I fight constantly against poverty thinking. I have been struggling for years to break free. This year, I am now starting to see some fruits of my success.
I’ve been teaching myself web design for the last four years. At the beginning of this year, I was able to start my own business. I just found a part-time job that pays ok, but gives me access to free educational resources that will save me a TON.
This is the first time in 20 years that when I needed extra money, I didn’t have to get a second job waiting tables. I’ve slowly improved my skill set to the point that I now have more options.
I think it is interesting that it surprises you that she is both poor and articulate. There are an incredible amount of educated people who are poor. The “sell” is that if you get a good education, you will be ok. It just isn’t true for everybody. The real deal is belief in yourself and tenacity.
There is a pervasive idea that anybody can make it in this country. It isn’t true. I mean, it is if you have self-worth and tenacity. But, some people were not raised to believe in themselves. Some people have been knocked down so much that they lose their ability to soldier through.
Breaking out of poverty is a heroic endeavor. Just because someone else has done it, doesn’t mean that everyone can do it. It is like saying that everyone can break the 4-minute mile, because it has been done before. Most of the people who have done that, did it with a professional coach.
The vast majority of poverty-stricken people need someone who has made it to come and walk beside them. The problem with that is that many people who make it out want nothing more to do with their poverty stricken friends. I have withdrawn myself more and more from some of my life long friends because they are so negative that is hinders me. I have found that I have to be VERY protective of my mind. I, like so many poor people, am prone to depression. I will have to be out of poverty for a really long time before I am able to spend significant time with those still in it. That is to protect my own state of mind, which dictates my quality of life.
One more thing, and this is a biggie…we have to stop telling people that they have to keep this big dream in focus, if they are going to make it. It is overwhelming. For someone who is struggling to survive, it can seem unrealistic and airy fairy.
In my opinion, it is much better to tell them to start investigating a subject matter that they are interested in. They should constantly have some resource, whether it is a book or podcast or blog so that they can build their reservoir of knowledge. This not only gives them a pleasant diversion (so badly needed,) but at some point (it may take years and years) that knowledge will become marketable.
I hate those Facebook posts criticizing the food stamp recipient for her iPhone. I believe, if you don’t have a computer, your smartphone is your biggest asset in the struggle to get out of poverty, if you use it correctly…and have a decent phone plan. Load that sucker up with positive podcasts and RSS feeds of great blogs. Check Craigslist ads for jobs listings in the field of your interest. You will see the skills that they want. Pick one and read about it. If you can’t get into it, pick another. Most libraries have downloadable audiobooks and ebooks…for free!
Constantly stay plugged in to positivity. That is the biggest advice I could ever give anyone. That and be kind to yourself. This idea that I “deserve” this or that destructive behavior only works when you don’t believe you deserve a better lifestyle. Be kind to yourself and take yourself seriously. Many poor people tell themselves, “who am I to do this or that.” Amazing things happen when you start taking yourself seriously. You start reading better quality of books and aligning yourself with more prosperous people. When you are kind to yourself, take yourself seriously, poor positivity into yourself and invest in learning, little by little you can pull yourself up. But, it takes time, self-belief and tenacity.
Scott says
April,
Thank you so much for your comments. I couldn’t agree more. Regarding your comment that I was surprised by her being poor and articulate, I wasn’t so much surprised – at least, not that someone poor could be articulate. I take issue with her acceptance of the mindset that says she is poor. In my eyes, “poor” is such a relative thing that it is mostly in one’s own mind and attitude. I don’t deny that there are plenty of people in poor circumstances (devastatingly so, in some cases). It is my aim to redefine poverty, in a sense. If someone like the author of this article can reframe her thinking and choose to see herself as fortunate to have the opportunity to improve her circumstances, then her poverty was nothing more than poor thinking.
I don’t mean to ridicule anyone in poor circumstances. It’s incredibly difficult to lift oneself out of poverty, but it must happen in the mind first. Someone with a “poor” mindset will always slide back into poverty. No matter how much wealth they accumulate, it will never be enough.
What are some resources you’d recommend for staying plugged into positivity? I love books and podcasts. I’ve talked about many of them on earlier episodes. Andy Andrews is one of my favorites (www.andyandrews.com).